I could feel the fires getting closer.....

   John 15:5-8  ⁵ "I am the vine; ^(E) you are the branches. The one who remains in Me and I in him produces much fruit, ^(F) because you can do nothing without Me. ⁶ If anyone does not remain in Me, he is thrown aside ^(G) like a branch and he withers. They gather them, throw them into the fire, ^(H) and they are burned. ^{(I) 7} If you remain in Me and My words remain in you, ask whatever you want and it will be done for you. ^{(J) 8} My Father is glorified ^(K) by this: that you produce much fruit and prove to be ^[a] My disciples


About a month ago my wife finally just asked me. Do you have a relationship with Christ? Excuse me? Of course I have a relationship with Christ. Then where's your fruit? I then spent the next week defending myself and my belief that I had a personal relationship with Christ. I grew up in the church. I said a prayer when I was 6. I rededicated my life when I was 13. I was a leader in my youth group....the list just keeps on going and going. The very fact that I became as defensive as I did and frustrated with both Amber and myself should have been a red flag. Where was my fruit? Where was my relationship?

In a completely God moment, that very week at church, Pastor Todd preached a sermon on a personal relationship with Christ that produced a life change and godly fruit. It was then that I realized that, no, I did not have a personal relationship with Christ. Sure, I said a prayer, I rededicated, I lead, I served, I even led others to Christ. But in that last statement there is no relationship. I was doing things my way. Needless to say, at the end of the sermon I went forward and talked to Pastor Todd and two weeks later I was baptized as a demonstration of my new life and relationship

I still struggle. I still stumble. But I now know that those slips, trips, and falls don't mean failure. I can't say for sure that before I was I was saved or not. I can now. I also know that ever since, I have not been tempted like I was, I have not failed like I used to.

I am now struggling to build habits and routines that build my relationship with Christ. I wake up an hour early everyday to read my Bible. When I have down time in the truck at work, I read my Bible. It has been amazing to share my story and see other people respond and be encouraged in their own walk. I feel that this is my ministry, telling my story, sharing peoples' hurts and struggles, and showing them that they are not alone in their sin. No one should feel like a freak and alone in theirown church or family. No one should have a church closet.....

My Prayer....

I am still alive....

I am still here, unless you were wondering. I was out of town on work and away from a computer for a week and a half. I am back now and ready to hit the grindstone. The time away was difficult because it was the longest Amber and I have been apart since we got married almost 2 years ago. It was a very long and tiring week and a half of early mornings and 15 hour work days. In the past, being stressed out, tired and lonely would have weakened my resolve and I would have sought "fulfillment" and "relief" in some very wrong places and people. I am happy, however, to report that I was what Amber calls a "good kid." a large part of this was due to the fact that I was getting up and going to work at 4:45 every morning and working 15+ hours a day and battling a chest cold all the time. Exhaustion and sickness tend to dampen your desires for the flesh.
The major crutch on which I leaned was my Bible. Specifically the Holman Christian Standard Bible for the Nook. My Nook has been a great blessing in that I can have my Bible with me in the work truck and I can whip it out whenever I need. I finished reading the book of John and moved in to Acts. I love how John chronicles the life and ministry of Christ, focusing on his miracles and signs, tangible evidences of his deity. John ends with the 40 days that Christ spends with the Disciples before his ascension. Acts seamlessly picks up the story with the day of Pentecost and the disciples going out and beginning their ministry.
I love the picture of the early Church in Acts. In chapter 2 it talks about how all the Believers sold all their possessions and shared everything as need be. They were in essence a communist society, based on a shared belief and faith in Jesus Christ. These early believers shared everything, their possessions, their homes, their worship, I would even presume their hurts and struggles. These people were human and struggled with the same exact sins that you and I face everyday. Can you imagine what our church today would look like if we shared in eachother's sins and struggles? If we were truly honest and open about our sins with eachother? If we saw sins as simply that, sins, not something that defines a person and makes them untouchable?
That is what No Church Closets is about. There should be no secrets between believers. We should be supporting eachother in our battles and struggles. The church should be a place where the Bad Boy is welcomed and encouraged, loved and treated as a precious creation in God's eyes, not as a freak. Why are the tax-collectors and harlots hated and shunned in the church, when those are the very ones Christ came to save? I want you to come out of your church closet. I want you to love as Jesus did. I want to love as Jesus did

Colossians 1:9-14

⁹ For this reason also, since the day we heard this, we haven't stopped praying for you. We are asking ^(K) that you may be filled with the knowledge ^(L) of His will ^(M) in all wisdom and spiritual understanding, ¹⁰ so that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing [to Him], bearing fruit in every good work ^(N) and growing in the knowledge of God. ^{(O) 11} May you be strengthened ^(P) with all power, ^(Q) according to His glorious ^(R) might, for all endurance and patience, with joy ¹² giving thanks to the Father, who has enabled you ^[e] to share in the saints' ^[f] inheritance in the light. ^{(S) 13} He has rescued ^(T) us from the domain of darkness and transferred us into the kingdom ^(U) of the Son ^(V) He loves, ^{(W) 14} in whom we have redemption, ^[g] the forgiveness of sins.

Watch This.....

This is the beginning.....

Let me tell you a story. Well, make it two stories......

The Good Boy

 The Good Boy grew up in the Church. A good church. With a good family. He accepted Christ when he was 6 years old. He re-dedicated his life to The Lord when he was 13. He went through High school as a good student and a leader among his friends. He was in Bible Quizzing, went on missions trips, was a counselor at a Christian summer camp, and dated the same girl for 3 years. After High school he went off to a prestigious Christian university. He became a leader in his resident hall, led research teams, tutored grade school students, was involved in student ministries, and worked in the university admissions office. He met the girl of his dreams and got married at graduation. They now have been married for almost 2 years. 

The End

The Bad Boy

   The Bad Boy grew in a Christian home. The Bad Boy had a secret. When the family got the internet, he got porn. Gay porn. He didn't know why he liked it. He didn't even want to like it. He tried to date a girl in High school and succeeded for almost 3 years. He felt soo alone in his heart. No one else struggled and felt the way he did. He would go to youth conventions and summer camps and sit through purity talks. He listened as people preached about not having sex with girls before marriage or looking at pictures of girls. No one ever mentioned being attracted to guys. This have meant that no one else had the same desires as this boy. He went off to college. one summer, when he was living alone, he started to experiment and sleep around with guys. All of this went on while he was dating the girl he loved. She found out, and still loved him enough to marry him. They were married for about a year and a half when he cheated on her with another guy. He went to counseling and eventually got to where he could control his desires.

The End....sort of....

I just told you 2 stories of 2 different boys. I am both those boys. I just told you my story. At times I feel as there are 2 Camerons battling inside me. Sometimes I forget which one is the real one.  The good news is that I have a new relationship, a very personal and intimate relationship with another man. Jesus Christ. Because I have given my life to the Lord, because I have now made Him Lord of my life, because I am filled with the Holy Spirit,  I have the ability to overcome and move beyond my unwanted desires. It is my hope that, through sharing my stories and the encouragement and resources I have found,  I can help someone else in a similar place find redemption, healing, and peace in the Lord